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Archive for the ‘dyspraxia’ Category

The older I get the more I realise how much my dyspraxia effects me and how badly managed it actualy is and also how few resources there are for adults with dyspraxia.

Almost all stuff I’ve found on managing dyspraxia are about children with dyspraxia within the education system, which is no help for me at all. since I am an adult who is not in the education system, a lot of the descriptions of dysprxia are something along the lines if “children with dyspraxia are very clumsy” or “children with dyspraxia have problems with coordination” and often go on to talk about how holding a pen or organising themselves is dificult, all of which is true but dyspraxia is so much more than that for me having dyspraxia is akin to my pattern recognition software being broken  or at least having a compleatly different pattern recognition software from everone else. But what people dont understand is that this doesnt just mean physical patterens, it means social patterns as well.

for myself my dyspraxia causes an inability to percieve and move through the world in the same way most people do

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the dyspraxia foundations list of sympoms do talk abous other symptoms of dyspraxia and from that list of symtoms the ones that effect me are

  • Poor balance. Difficulty in riding a bicycle, going up and down hills
  • Poor posture and fatigue. Difficulty in standing for a long time as a result of weak muscle tone. Floppy, unstable round the joints.
  • Poor integration of the two sides of the body.
  • Poor hand-eye co-ordination.
  • Clumsy gait and movement.
  • Tendency to fall, trip, bump into things and people
  • Lack of manual dexterity. Poor at two-handed tasks, causing problems with using cutlery, cleaning, cooking, ironing, craft work, playing musical instruments
  • Poor manipulative skills. Difficulty with typing, handwriting and drawing. May have a poor pen grip, press too hard when writing and have difficulty when writing along a line
  • Difficulty with dressing and grooming activities, such as putting on makeup, shaving, doing hair, fastening clothes and tying shoelaces
  • Speech may have uncontrolled pitch, volume and rate
  • Poor visual perception
  • Difficulty in distinguishing sounds from background noise. Tendency to be over-sensitive to noise
  • Over- or under-sensitive to touch. Can result in dislike of being touched and/or aversion to over-loose or tight clothing – tactile defensiveness
  • Lack of awareness of body position in space and spatial relationships. Can result in bumping into and tripping over things and people, dropping and spilling things
  • Inadequate sense of direction. Difficulty distinguishing right from left means map reading skills are poor
  • Difficulty in planning and organising thought
  • Unfocused and erratic. Can be messy and cluttered
  • Difficulty in listening to people, especially in large groups. Can be tactless, interrupt frequently
  • Difficulty in picking up non-verbal signals or in judging tone or pitch of voice in themselves and or others.
  • Slow to adapt to new or unpredictable situations. Sometimes avoids them altogether
  • Impulsive. Tendency to be easily frustrated, wanting immediate gratification

So yes I have all the clumsy disorganised stuff going on, and sometimes thats really hard work, I do usualy look presentable but thats because its taken me a lot more time and effort than non dyspraxic people, But I’m mostly okay with the frustrations of being clumsy, of having bad spacial awareness, of not being good with my hands, of finding sequencing peices of writing difficult because the world does make alowances for this if people know I’m dyspraxic, what the world doesnt make alowances for and what I find really exhausting is the social stuff

Dyspraxia is much less common in women so is lees likeley to be picked up or taken seriously but also some of the things that male dyspraxics “get away with” female dyspraxics can’t. I have always been less than feminine because the outward trappings of femininity are imposible for me, I cant wear high heels because I cant balance in them and my ankles turn over. I dont wear make up frequently because the time and effort and frustration level it takes for me to look anything other than clown like are just not worth it

and the stuff that is supposed to be seen as “naturaly” feminine such as grace an tact are either really hard work or compleatly unobtainable to to me.

Theres a cultural trope that says middle class women are suppose to be subtle, gentle, self effacing and apologetic and i rub against that alot, partly because of life experiences but mostly because I dint understand the rules of that, I am called up for being agressive or too blunt or tactless when from where i am I’m just saying what I think honestly. i cant do the middle claas niceness/self effacing thing, not because i dont want to but becaus I dont understand it

I think men are given more leeway to be tactless and loud and unsublte, and forgiven for not picking up on other people subtleties so dyspraxic men have more of a buffer zone than dyspraxic women do.

Also one of my things is sensory overload which is exacerbated by PTSD and when people stand really close to be that is likeley to set it of. As a woman my persobnal spcae bubble is seen as less importand annd more invadable/encroachable than mens are so dypraxic woman are more at risk of having their sensory overload triggered by every day encounters.

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